Vocally political and liberal Steve Rogers
Fox News has no idea how to handle it because he’s Captain America and he’s literally from the 40’s…
OH oh oh and Jon Stewart inviting him on his show, and when he comes out, says, “Dude. You gunnin’ for my job calling these jackasses out?”
And Steve blushes and drawls, “Naw, but I do appreciate you educating people on the proper way to eat pizza in New York. But hey, thanks for getting me started. It was watching you that helped me get caught up on some of this stuff…”
Jon makes “my head is exploding” gestures.
"No, no it’s true! My team thought it might be a good jumping off place for me to ask questions. We kinda…listen, S.H.I.E.L.D first told me what they thought I’d want to know…."
Jon drawls, “And we all saw how THAT turned out.” Steve smiles sadly.
"Yeah, but we’re gettin’ a little ahead of ourselves. Nat and Clint…"
"That’s Natasha Romanova and Clint Barton, Black Widow and Hawkeye respectively."
"Yeah, Nat’ll be really pleased you got her name right," Steve grins.
"Pleased? Really?" Jon perks up like a middle schooler with a crush. “‘Cause I’d hate for her to not…." he mock wipes sweat off his forehead and gulps. "I’d hate to get on her bad side."
"Yeah. Trust me." Steve rolls his eyes. "You do not wanna go there."
"Ooh, do I sense Story Time with Uncle Steve?"
"You sense a man with the tactical sense not to…."
"Poke a Russian Bear?"
Steve puts his hands up in surrender and speaks to the audience. ”You guys back me up on this?” He points to Jon. ”HE said it, not me.”
"You know I’m just gonna hide behind you, Cap."
"Yeah, well, that might not be enough protection. ANYWAY, Nat and Clint tried to get me as caught up as much as they could….I mean, to me, I’d been fighting World War II just the week before, lost buddies….”
"Your best buddy," Jon says softly, sympathy clear on his face.
"Exactly." Steve’s smile is pained. "It was a lot to take in." He shakes off his sadness. "Once we got the team, The Avengers, together…" He laughs. "Suddenly, one of the team building exercises was to get me up to date on…EVERYTHING. Everybody tried to help me get caught up in their own way, music, movies, art, tv…and it was Tony, actually…"
"Iron Man…Tony Stark,"
"Yeah, who said, that if I wanted to get the best no-bull view of America, let’s start with you and Colbert, though, I gotta admit, at first I didn’t know when Mr. Colbert was joking, so we stuck The Daily Show to start. Tony said that I might as well learn in a way that had an equal chance to make me laugh *and* tear my hair out, instead of the, you know, just tearing my hair… And he was right."
"That, that, my dear Captain, is the most humbling and terrifying thing I’ve ever heard."
"Hey," Steve shakes an affectionate finger. "No tearing yourself down!"
"Yes, sir!" Jon salutes, over-the-top beaming, and Steve rolls his eyes good-naturedly.
"Well, I noticed some of the folks you had on that were historians and journalists, and checked out their work, too….like that Rachel Maddow and Fareed Zakariah."
"Oh thank god I can share the blame, I mean honor! But, hey, Cap, we’re here to talk about you making news with, you know, words instead of punches…though lately it’s clear you’re not pulling punches with your mouth, either. Wow, that came out weird. You’ve said some extraordinary things in interviews lately, and I gotta say, the way you went after Bill O’Reilly a few months back, which is when this well, let’s just ‘Cap Wants America To Pull Its’ Head Out Of Its’ Ass’ campaign, for lack of a better title…" Jon cackles and Steve blushes.
"I’m just calling it like I see it, Mr. Stewart. Something I think you might be familiar with. But jeez, do you have to call it that? Kids could be watching…"
"Oh my god you’re adorable. I think your version of telling it like it is and mine…let’s just say it might be a little different coming from a guy who punched Hitler and can bench press Cleveland. Hey, Jimmy, roll 2:12.”
And after the clip, Jon starts an interview that leads him Steve through the major points of the things he’s been speaking up about, one of those gorgeous interviews that lets you see what a great interviewer Jon is, and it runs so far over, they have enough to make three full shows out of it. Jon pre-empts the next week’s interview sections and makes it a series. ”Captain America wants you to understand ________” Captain America wants you to understand why gay marriage is important; Captain America wants you to understand about welfare and families with single parents.
"Because Cap wouldn’t let us call it, "Captain America Wants America To Get Its’ Head Out Of Its’ Ass."
Ohhh my goooooooosh this is amazing :D